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I am a man about the business of taking care of business, minding my own business and staying out of yours. I don't care what devices people use to separate themselves from others (religion, money, race, gender, class, intelligence etc.) at the end of the day you came from the earth and so shall you return. The only advice I have is try to live and love without fear.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Black Fatherhood; Community or Convenience?

So I'm watching the season premier of The Game on Black Exploitation Television and the subject matter came up about one of the characters offspring not belonging to him. He questioned whether he would stay in the child's life knowing the offspring wasn't his or not wanting to know at all. So the question I would ask is would you stay cause it's the right thing to do, or would you cut all ties and leave with no hesitation?

People think that most black men would just run out as fast as they could when finding out that the child belongs to someone else in most cases right? Maybe so or maybe not I can't say. I would ask why is that? For the longest black men catch a bad wrap when it comes down to men taking care of kids. We are all generalized when encountering women and the questions is asked "how many kids do you have?" as if it's an epidemic,not to mention the look we get afterwards as if we mistreated every woman we met.


Also if the answer is none then your sexual practices are questioned followed by more looks of disgrace. What's that all about? How did black men get reduced to sex machines, dead beat dads and no good dogs? Why aren't we the Kings we were intended to be? So the question of would you stay if you were unaware of the paternity of the child ,really doesn't help the way we're viewed and furthers perpetuate these stereotypes we often hear. I feel that as a young educated black man I understand that there are forces that want me to fall victim of a certain status or way of life,and I know that my heritage and education teach that I should combat these evils that want me dead or in jail.

How is it that you can look at other communities and see male role models present and accounted for but not in the African American communities? How is it that African American males don't feel there's something wrong with this picture? Why is it so easy to just walk away from someone's life who may look to you for guidance and say he or she isn't mine?


These are questions I pose to anyone in various positions of influence. Back when our communities were able to teach boys to be men and things of value were giving to them through rites of passage the community was a solid unit. Our youth understood when the time was right for them to go out on their own to be a man or woman. Nowadays you never hear of black men having rites of passage ceremonies or coming of age event for their sons and daughters.

How can we get back on the right track? What can we say is the reason for that not happening in our community? Are we not concerned with our youth, or do we not know importance of this time we are missing out on? Are we or should we really try harder to get more involved? Do you feel it take a community to raise a child? If so let's continue to use that understanding and do what's right to raise our unguided youth.

1 comment:

  1. Love the post!!! Very well spoken. The right way to get this back on track is for everyone to get involved. Many people, men and women, state that the white man has stolen everything from "us". The fact is the white man has not taken anything we have enslaved ourselves with the mindset that we are being held back by the white man. In the books that I have read by Booker T. Washington, Olaudah Equiano, and Fredrick Douglas, these men went through plenty to learn to read and write and go to school but the white man did everything that he could to stop them but they pursued education. Today, the opportunities to go to school to learn are endless. The fact that we have the opportunity we don't want it. The jobs that we want requires education and we don't want to pursue an education to reach that point. We are settling for less which is what is wanted. The Black community was about Black community. Today it is if I make it, I'm good. I don't want to help others. Also, our seniors are afraid to speak to the young people because the young people want to physically and verbally abuse them. Everyone is afraid to speak out because they fear being killed for doing the right thing. MLK was killed for trying to unite ALL people of every race and color. We should definitely try harder to get more involved, take our streets and neighborhoods back. Be able to walk down the streets at night without worrying about being mugged. When I was coming up, if a neighbor saw you doing something you had no business doing, you got a whooping!!! Then you got one from your parents when the neighbor brought you home. That is what it will take to get the unguided youth to get back in order. However, there are many parents that thinks their child will not do such things, which means they are totally oblivious to what is going on. It truly starts at home. The programs that used to be offered are no longer offered because the people who cared are no longer alive. Now it is our time to take it back to the basics.

    Terria

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